About Life
When you get bored
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Riddles About Men
About sex
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Miscellaneus I
Miscellaneus II

Before the movie:

1. Move to the front of the theater and say"I guess you're all wondering why I called you here today..."

2. Give an informative speech on subliminal messages. ("This being Subliminal Message Awareness Month, we invite you to visit our Website; the address will be flashed periodically across the screen during the movie.") Very effective when using signs that read "Ban Subliminal Messages" and so forth.

3. Toss around a beach ball.

4. Move to the front of the theater and do your best Wayne Newton impersonation, doing several renditions of that song that was in "Vegas Vacation".When you finish, calmly return to your seat as if nothing happened.

5. Walk proudly to the front of the theater and say," Would you all please rise for the singing of the national anthem?" Sing loudly and extremely off-key, yet patriotically.

6. Lead everyone in a rousing medley from "Oklahoma"

7. Stand and say," Does anyone want to go together and get a pizza? Just bring a few dollars over here and I'll get it worked out."

8. Ask that everyone look under their seats to see if they've won the all-expense paid trip to Hawaii.

9. Go to the front of the theater and say that you feel it's a shame that people spend two to three hours sitting together and not get to know each other. Ask everyone to hug three people sitting near them and exchange a few phone numbers and e-mail or mailing addresses.

10. Go to an almost filled row (one without two empty seats together) and ask them to move down so that you can sit with your (invisible) friend Al. After they've rearranged themselves for you say,"Didn't you hear Al? He said he wants to sit in the front. Thanks anyway." Repeat every three minutes wearing a lame disguise.

11. Move to the front of the theater and say,"May I please have your undivided attention? Would you all please move back one row and to your left three seats? If this leaves you without a seat, please exit to the hall and await further instructions. Thank you."

12. Ask if anyone has a birthday on that day. If someone actually says yes, ask them to come up while everyone sings "Happy Birthday" to them.

13. Say," Due to problems we've had in the past, we'll be leaving the lights on during the movie today."

14. In "Titanic" pass out noseplugs and lifejackets at the doors and advise people to put them on.

15. Carry a giant teddy bear in with you and sit on its lap.

16. While walking down the aisle drop to your knees and scream for a good 20 seconds and calmly find a seat.

17. Exclaim"Let's have a scavenger hunt! Who can find a live roach?....Well, hey! I've already got that!!"

18. Tell people around you to look for demonic symbols in a particular scene.

19. When someone you don't know sits down next to you say,"I thought you'd never get here!"

During the movie:

1. Wrap your legs around the neck of the person in front of you and say,"This doesn't bother you, does it?"

2. Loudly ask,"Did somebody step in doo-doo?"

3. Snore loudly.

4. Talk loudly throughout the movie and every time someone says,"SHHH!!", mimic them obnoxiously.

5. Give a running commentary about what's about to happen in the movie.

6. Exclaim,"Disgusting! Look what's in my popcorn!" Hold it up to the light so everyone can see the (fake) rat attached to your popcorn container.

7. Yell"Don't you EVER do that again!!"

8. Stand up and say,"Nobody move! I lost my contact! Stop the movie!Stop the movie!"

9. Say"Did you just feel something run by your legs? I think it was a RAT !!!"

10. During the most romantic scene in the movie, exclaim,"WHOA!!Who let one? WOW, that is bad! Someone certainly has a problem!! Boy, some people just have no respect for others!" Continue like this until people start making death threats.

11. At an inportant point in the movie, stand up and remain there for a solid five minutes, then turn around, looking embarassed , and giggle. Then with a straight face say, "I'm wearing my grandmother's Wonderbra." Finally sit down.

12. At no particular part in the movie, turn around and stare at the person behind you for a solid five minutes. Finally ,grinning evilly, say,"You know, don't you?". Turn around and laugh wickedly.

13. If someone stands up to go somewhere during the movie,scream"Ha,ha!Nature strikes again!"

14. When you return from getting snacks,sit down . Five minutes later yell,"They're giving away free popcorn!"

15. When the final credits begin to roll, scream,"Some people LIKE to watch the closing credits! NOW SIT DOWN, ALL OF YOU!!NOBODY'S GOING ANYWHERE!! " Finally let people leave when the manager calls the police.

Here are the lists, When you get bored:
In the church
At the cinema
At work
In an elevator